The Calm Through Storms

I've come a long way from the days of sitting around as a youth, dreaming about what life would be like, chasing these ideas I had in my head of how things should be for me when I got older and what work will have to be done to see them through to fruition, yet, the most rewarding aspects of this journey I’ve undertaken seem to come more in the form of what I’ve learned, rather than what I’ve gained along the way. Lessons that can’t be taught from a book. In my youth, I’d hear that and wonder to myself how exactly I could learn it then. Experience is the best teacher, I was told, and I had a lot to learn, indeed. I was fairly stubborn as a kid, so although it took quite a few attempts, sometimes, before the lessons could sink in, when they did, things changed for the better. Sometimes immediately, most often, eventually. I had to stick with it, not just regurgitate it. Countless lessons learned, challenging those very same ideas I was chasing from my youth, and I have a mind to write them down so that as time passes, I don’t lose them. Here I am.

One of those lessons was the necessity of remaining composed throughout trials in life.

When it comes to emotions in general, we are conditioned to believe that they are a benefit for us to have/display when certain situations call for them. While I followed that line of thought in my youth, I watched and recognized more and more each day just how destructive that cycle can truly be. I saw it in my own life, and in the lives of those around me. Anger is one such emotion people tend to believe gives us an advantage when used under the "right circumstances," but a mentor of mine once challenged me to really think that through. Anger isn't strength, it's weakness. Giving myself over to something that would cause me to behave irrationally or at least in a manner which I recognized was not my right mind didn't seem to me like something I would benefit from employing, but instead I realized that much more would be lost.

So, I began to think it through.

When you become angry, you lose yourself. Whether for a moment or for a lifetime, when you allow yourself to be driven by any emotion, and especially anger, you no longer have control of the action. You can’t have composure; until it subsides, you are at its mercy. It is not gracious. It is not forgiving, it is destructive, and it does not allow you to overcome while you are in it. It compels you to stay and fester, taking from you the very thing that makes you, you. You can’t think, you can’t focus, and you can’t make good decisions until it passes, and yet it’s viewed as a benefit? In return, you get to clean the mess it makes, but sometimes even that burden seems too heavy, so what does one do instead?

Let it go.

In order to grow properly into the man I desired to become, I had to learn to forgive and put aside emotions if I ever wanted a chance to succeed. I would not allow emotions to control my actions. As a much older and hopefully wiser man now, I see the benefits in that decision made some time ago by a young version of me and the healthier outcomes that doing that work over time has produced. Peace is the greatest among them. As I continue along this path and the moment it truly began slips further and further away from me, I’ll always carry with me the lessons that pursuing it continues to teach me.

No matter the situation you must endure, focus, remain calm, and composed as you act to see it through. This too shall pass.

I’ll keep that wisdom with me, always.